Pruning

Time to pull myself out of the funk I have been in.

It all started with the turnover of the HOA (homeowners association). Every time I thought about the turnover I would get the biggest knot in my stomach. After much contemplation I realized that I was worried about being thrown off the board and I wasn't ready for that. I liked being in "control" (I believe that is a figment of my imagination) of what was going on in my neighborhood and truly frightened that if I wasn't on the board the neighborhood would fall into disrepair. Boy, do I think a lot of my abilities!

Reality Check was in order!

After MORE contemplation, the right kind, not born out of survival mode I realized that being on the Board is one of the things that causes me undue stress almost daily. Our home teachers shared a message on pruning the bad branches out of our lives. Bro. Klein used the term "sucker branches" that are pretty, have all their leaves but do not produce anything and take unnecessary nutrients from the rest of the tree that is bearing fruit.

Since I have made the decision that I do not need to be on the Board and that there is a better use for my time and mental health, I have felt at peace and a need to get things in order with the work I have done for the HOA. 

Originally, I tried to get Mr. Finn to make the decision for me, but he was wise and let me make it, knowing that I would be able to let it go more easily and most importantly...NOT BLAME HIM! Ha! Poor guy, he gets a bum rap sometimes.

Maybe now I can shake the yuckies of the past several weeks and get on living. My apologies to my children who have to be with me 24/7 and had to live with the sorting out phase of all this. They are troopers and I love them with all my heart. They are my good branches and they need my attention and focus at this time in their lives. I am a mother first!