Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Enigma

I have this amazing little girl that can infuriate me more than anything else in the world.  I find her to be a complete enigma most days.  She is so opinionated in one moment and then so needy in the next.  I don't know "how" to parent her most days.  I feel so inadequate when it comes to her.  I feels as if I can't give her enough of what she wants, love, affection, understanding, discipline, consistency, laughter, humor, you name it.

The part that I find most frustrating is that when I think I am ready to take the proverbial leap off the cliff, I hear "Mom!" in that tone that drives me crazy.  I always answer gruffly, "What!?" and she answers so sweetly, "I Love You."

I feel like such a heel.
Is this normal?
Do they do this on purpose or is it just because I am so impatient and so clueless as a mother?

I love her so much.  I want to be a good mother so she won't grow up in therapy.
I'm am afraid that it may be too late and she is already therapy bound.

Yet, she seems so well adjusted in spite of me and so unbelievably creative.  And smart... oh my heavens.  How am I going to help with her homework?
Do you ever stop feeling inadequate?

And just when she gets her hair long like she wanted, she wants it cut off immediately.
I guess I should just admire her for following her passion.  She is quite amazing.

But... I think I already said that because I KNOW that.

1 comment:

Shannon said...

Being a Mom = the most difficult job we will ever love! :)