Enigma

I have this amazing little girl that can infuriate me more than anything else in the world.  I find her to be a complete enigma most days.  She is so opinionated in one moment and then so needy in the next.  I don't know "how" to parent her most days.  I feel so inadequate when it comes to her.  I feels as if I can't give her enough of what she wants, love, affection, understanding, discipline, consistency, laughter, humor, you name it.

The part that I find most frustrating is that when I think I am ready to take the proverbial leap off the cliff, I hear "Mom!" in that tone that drives me crazy.  I always answer gruffly, "What!?" and she answers so sweetly, "I Love You."

I feel like such a heel.
Is this normal?
Do they do this on purpose or is it just because I am so impatient and so clueless as a mother?

I love her so much.  I want to be a good mother so she won't grow up in therapy.
I'm am afraid that it may be too late and she is already therapy bound.

Yet, she seems so well adjusted in spite of me and so unbelievably creative.  And smart... oh my heavens.  How am I going to help with her homework?
Do you ever stop feeling inadequate?

And just when she gets her hair long like she wanted, she wants it cut off immediately.
I guess I should just admire her for following her passion.  She is quite amazing.

But... I think I already said that because I KNOW that.

Oh... little town of...

We live in a charming little town that hosts a Christmas lighting ceremony the night before Thanksgiving.  Every year it is wonderful and every now and then we get a fun surprise...

... like Reindeer.  This one happens to be named "Rudolph".

We have these teenage girls that dress up as Angels and dance in front of the courthouse every year.  I know Sarah, the one in the middle.

Miss Boo is fickle about pictures.  This night is was all about the "No Paparrazi!".

As you can see, the Dude is always up for a picture.  He loves the scavenger hunt thing we do.  They collect stickers from all the local businesses in the old downtown and then they can trade the paper in for a book.  They then will put the paper in a box for a drawing that will take place the week after.

The fun part is that everyone wins the drawing.

Shhhh... don't tell the kids.

Miss Boo wanted a carriage ride so badly.  So we stood in line a very, very long time and then had to split up so we could actually get that ride.  She went with her Daddy and the Dude went with me.

Luckily when the Dude and I got our turn the horses were tired, so only 3 adults got to go with 3 children.  It was very relaxing.

I love courthouses.  There is something about them, especially in small towns.  Just a certain bit of charm.

I love where we live.  The people are great, the town is sweet and we are close enough to the city that I don't have to do without what it has to offer.

We pray that we can live here a long time and let out children call this home.
It's always good to have a hometown full of memories that you can carry into adulthood.

This Kid

I totally dig this kid.

I have never known anyone so in love with stuffed animals.  He bought this one at an estate sale.  I am not one to let my kids buy old stuffed animals, but it was an elderly lady that had passed on.  Her great grandchildren had made it for her at Build A Bear.  He fell in love the instant he saw it and would not stop.
I finally agreed to lend him the dollar to buy it.  You would have thought I had given him a million dollars.  He was so proud and excited buying it.

The minute we got home he ran to his piggy bank to pay me back for the most awesome dinosaur in the world.

I am grateful for children that understand the responsibility and weight of money.  A dollar is a lot of money to him and to make a deal like this, he had to be in love.

On this Thanksgiving I am grateful for my family.  I have been blessed with wonderful children that test me and give me great joy.

Stats

Modern technology is FABULOUS!

Because of all the wonderful statistics this blogsite provides (that Mr. Finn set up) I get to know WHO is stalking me at all times.

Is this YOU?

ROFL

Sisters

I tagged a long for visit to Aunt Jane in Columbia.

Sometimes in a family you end up with the norm...
1 whole sister, 2 half sisters, 1 adopted brother/nephew and 2 step sisters.

I was asked by someone when my sisters were coming for their visit, "Which ones?".

My reply, "the ones I like".

It's funny that in a family, you can have a strained relationship with your "biological" family and the "step" one can become the one you most relate to.  

I'm not saying that it started out this way with my step sisters, it was definitely a process and took a lot of time.  

Maybe that is why it is enduring and why I enjoy being around them so much.

It isn't hard to be around them.  Just easy, cheesy, nice and peasy.   (can you name the movie?)

Mainly because I don't feel judged all the time or that there is something else motivating the visit.  I just get to be with them and laugh.  We do have fun together.

Besides, they got me to see some sights that I haven't been to here.  Almost 6 years and didn't even know about the Federal Reserve.  Seriously... so much fun.

I love my sisters!

Mi Companera

 My goodness... has it been that long?  I guess the proof is in the picture taken at 6 a.m. without any primping.

Well... maybe it is just that these young missionaries got old... er!

Kara was a companion I did not want.  I actually prayed frequently that I would not be paired with her.

She terrified me.  I'm not sure why, but she caused me to shake in my knickers.

And then the inevitable happened... she became my companion the last month of her mission.  She actually extended her mission to be my companion.
You would think I would be flattered.
Not so much!
Still terrified.
And the first week cemented my fear.
She rode a bike like a maniac.  A strong, in shape maniac.  Up and down the steep hills in the Dominican Republic.  I wanted to scream.  My body was not used to such treatment.  She was undeterred to slow down.
In fact, she relished being in front of me.  Because... if she was, she could clip my front tire and if it was just right, my bike would go out of control and down I would go.

And she would laugh with that laugh I grew to love  Mainly because it meant she was happy.  Truly happy.  Something I really didn't know or feel.

She would pray that I wouldn't sleep at night until I figured out how to be happy and to know that my Heavenly Father loved me.

I would lie there exhausted, yearning for sleep and I would hear her giggling from her bed, which only added to my frustration.
How could she be so heartless, I would ask myself.
I soon learned how big her heart really was and how much she wanted me to be happy.  Truly happy.

Once I learned what I needed to learn and learned to love her, I could sleep again and shortly thereafter she left.
Leaving me a better missionary.
Leaving me a with a lasting friendship.

Thanks Kara for stopping by on your way home from Utah.  It totally made my day, week, and year.
Love you.

Say Goodbye

The Dude has finally given up his "potty aid".  Yeah!  That is so worth celebrating!

Now if only I could get him to wipe his own bum... hmmm!

Not so fast

 I am struggling with the increased rate in which my children seem to be growing up these days.  It was just yesterday she was born.  Tomorrow we are going to be beating the boys off the front porch.  I'm not ready for that.  She is a creative, spirited little girl that went from a size 7/8 to a 10/12 within a couple of months.  And the 7/8's were bought for school this year.  She has always been off the charts and she still maintains that distinction in most aspects of her life and personality.

She did tell me the other night that she is not going to grow up and stay home with me forever.  I wish!  Well... not sure if that is my wish, but it is certainly good to hear it.  One day she will be desperately wanting her own freedom.  Away from us!  That will hard.  Somedays it seems so real that it makes me sad.

I did these curls with a flat iron.  Who knew!?

 I appreciate President Uchdorf's talk about "Forget Me Nots" as it reminds us to find happiness in the now.  I have to keep reminding myself to enjoy them now... not when the laundry is done.

I wonder how many moments I have missed because I said, "Just a minute!".  The other night the two of them came running in to show me a dance they had learned (square dance) and were so excited.  I almost sent them out because I was wrapped up in something.  I am so glad I took the time to watch them.  It was hilarious and heart warming at the same time.

I love this face.  When she was born I would spend hours studying it as if I would forget something about her.  I still find her face unbelievably fascinating and wonderful.

And... I spend many moments just staring at her.  I am grateful that we are blessed to have her in our home.

Halloween 2011

 Too sweet for words.

 If only he were the sheik of an oil well...

 There's no place like home...

If ever I wanted a dog...

 We have the most creative farmer that lives out on the highway.  Last year he did pigs and this year...